


everything means nothing (if i ain't got you)

by mukeandziamgotmelike



Series: volleyball girls [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Best Friends, Crying, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Jealousy, Light Angst, Protectiveness, Rule 63, but like lowkey bc its yamaguchi, on kags' part
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-09-07 14:06:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8803771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mukeandziamgotmelike/pseuds/mukeandziamgotmelike
Summary: In all honesty, it’s not like she is mad at Tsukki. Sure, she’s a little frustrated that now Tsukki doesn’t hang out with her as much, but it’s fine. She just got a boyfriend; Tadashi should feel happy for her. Except, as she’s realized before, she’s not. And she has no idea why. That’s what friends do, right? Support each other no matter what? If you exclude Oikawa-san and her ace, who acts like a jealous girlfriend -Wait.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i've had this written for like 3 months so i decided to post it have fun i love tsukkiyama

Tadashi is in the depths of despair. And she is  _ not  _ being overdramatic. Not in the slightest.

She gets it, she really does; Tsukki was beautiful (tall, blonde, legs to  _ die  _ for), who wouldn’t want to date her? Tadashi knew this day was coming, knew it 100%, in the back of her mind. Silly her, though, that voice in her head that would always tell her  _ maybe this time. _

It had all started last week, when Tsukishima casually told her that they couldn’t eat lunch together. Which, all in all, was not that big of a deal for Tadashi. Sure, she knew she could be a little clingy, but that didn’t mean she would stop Tsukki from having other friends. That was her business, and Tadashi really didn’t mind.

Or, at least, that’s what she tried to convince herself of.

But she had been able to hide the jealousy burning in the pit of her stomach and had kept what she hoped was a calm look, because she was  _ totally completely fine  _ with it, then went to go eat with Hinata and Kageyama. They hadn’t minded, of course, and Yachi eventually showing up had made it all the better. Their first year manager was really cute, and he helped the idiot duo stay on the team, and Tadashi  _ adored  _ him.

She had nearly forgotten about this until after practice that day; when they all walked home and Sawamura-san bought them all meat buns like any true captain should. It was then that a tall boy had walked up to them (read: Tsukki) and put his arm around her. She had taken her headphones off and smiled at him.

Which Tadashi wouldn’t have minded. Really.

Except that it was the smile that Tsukki only showed to people who she trusted, people who she actually loved, people like her mother, people like  _ Tadashi. _ Tadashi was sure that her facial expression must’ve spoken volumes, for Sugawara magically appeared by her side like some sort of guardian angel (a fair comparison) with a hand on her shoulder.

Now, they haven’t eaten together in a week. Tadashi  _ knows  _ that she shouldn’t care,  _ knows  _ that she should feel happy for Tsukki, but as much as she tries to tell herself that… 

She just can’t convince herself that this is all okay.

“Tsukishima’s new boyfriend is cute!” Hinata chirps one day. Yachi gives a little shrug (because despite how terrified he is of everyone, he’s still protective over all the girls on the volleyball team; even if they can clearly all take care of themselves). Kageyama gives Hinata a stone cold glare through her dark fringe and Hinata glares back. “What, Bakageyama? Why do you have that stupid look -”

Hinata cuts herself off as her bright eyes are drawn to Tadashi when she hears a sob. 

Tadashi is crying, tears she never knew she was holding running down her cheeks, with her lips in an extremely forced smile.

“You’re right, Hina,” she says, “he is pretty cute.”

Hinata stares, gaping, then turns to Kageyama without changing her expression. Kageyama awkwardly eyes Tadashi, because she doesn’t know  _ what  _ to do when someone is crying. Yachi looks like he’s about to start crying, too, so Tadashi sucks it up. “S-Sorry, we just barely hang out anymore, and I -”

She shakes her head, looking down. 

Hinata hugs her, and doesn’t let go until she’s smiling again.

\---

Tadashi serves the ball to the other side of the net, then runs up to her defensive position. She’s on a team with Kageyama and Hinata, along with Kinoshita-san, Narita-san, and Nishinoya-san, who is laughing at Tanaka-san’s attempts to glare. This is one of the first times she’s not on a team with Tsukki, and she  _ knows  _ she’s not being subtle about it anymore, if even their coach notices.

Daichi is just barely able to get the ball up, and Sugawara runs to set it.

In all honesty, it’s not like she is mad at Tsukki. Sure, she’s a little frustrated that now Tsukki doesn’t hang out with her as much, but it’s  _ fine.  _ She just got a boyfriend; Tadashi should feel happy for her. Except, as she’s realized before, she’s not. And she has no idea why. That’s what friends do, right? Support each other no matter what? If you exclude Oikawa-san and her ace, who acts like a jealous girlfriend -

_ Wait.  _

Azumane spikes it over, and Nishinoya receives it easily, winking at the ace who blushes intensely. Kageyama and Hinata do their super quick, and they win the point. 

_ What? _

Tadashi serves again, and Tanaka happens to be right there.

She does  _ not  _ like Tsukki. Not like that, at least. She liked her as a friend - a best friend - they had known each other for years, of  _ course  _ she would hold her in one of the highest regards. Tsukki was amazing, and really pretty, and actually  _ nice  _ to Tadashi, glaring at anyone and everyone who had ever made fun of her. For her looks, for her hair, for her weight - 

And Tadashi is  _ so  _ fucked.

The ball is coming right at her, so she passes it on pure reflex alone. It’s a little off, so Kageyama runs to set it, right to Hinata who slams it down. That’s the last point of the match, so Hinata jumps away to get a ball for her and Kageyama to break off into their private practicing. Tadashi starts to walk under the net to Tsukki, when a hand on her arm stops her. Kageyama is there, and she is  _ glaring  _ at Tsukishima through the net. 

Granted, Tsukishima doesn’t seem to notice, as she is busy holding a ball above Nishinoya-san’s head as the libero tries her hardest to do some Hinata-level jumping. 

“Kageyama? What are you -”

“She made you cry.” Kageyama’s blue eyes are sharper than normal, her face looking even scarier now that she’s actually trying to make it that way. Sugawara had once mentioned that Kageyama had a ‘resting bitch face’, that she always looked pissed without having to try. Well, she’s trying now, and Tadashi feels the need to back away.

“Do you wanna practice with Hinata and I? She could use more work on her receives and your serves are getting harder to pick up,” Kageyama says. Tadashi spares a look at Tsukki, who’s on her phone texting, before nodding. “Yeah. Thanks.”

Hinata looks absolutely  _ delighted  _ that Tadashi agreed to practice with them, which helps with Tadashi’s confidence. Hinata never fails to make her smile, and Tadashi understands why she’s the sunshine of the team. 

She can feel Tsukishima looking at her from across the court, her eyes silently asking  _ what are you doing hanging out with those two idiots.  _ Tadashi serves again, ignoring the feeling, and finds herself smiling at the happy crow noise that Hinata makes after landing another successful spike. She straightens up, waving goodbye to Hinata and Kageyama and tentatively walking over to Tsukishima. 

“Hi,” she whispers, seeing that her bag is on Tsukishima’s shoulder. “Where’s your boyfriend?” 

Tsukki raises an eyebrow. “He didn’t come today,” she says cautiously. Tadashi nods a little, her fingers fiddling at her waist. Tsukishima eyes them, then puts on her headphones. “Let’s go,” she says, turning to walk out of the gym. Tadashi follows. 

“Why are you nervous?” Tsukishima asks as they’re walking, her voice startling Tadashi out of her thoughts. “You’ve been acting weird lately.”

Tadashi bites her lip, and sighs in exasperation. “Oh,  _ I’ve  _ been acting weird?”

Tsukki gives her a confused look, and Tadashi finds herself letting out a strange, annoyed sound. “And how would you know?! You’ve barely talked to me in the last couple weeks, Tsukishima! You don’t- you can’t just—” Tsukishima’s eyes are wide in shock and her headphones are around her neck. Her hands are shaking.

Tadashi bites her lip again, tears coming to her eyes. “And do you know what the worst part is? It’s that… you don’t even care. You’ve been doing just fine without me, just fine with  _ him _ ; and you’ve forgotten about me. I tried to tell myself to be happy for you, to just let you do your thing, but do you know how  _ hard  _ it is? To know that your best friend since elementary school suddenly doesn’t care anymore?”

“I never stopped caring about you,” Tsukishima whispers, her hands clenched in fists at her sides. They are still shaking. “But it’s much easier to avoid you than to…” “Than to what?” Tadashi asks, “because I’ve been so alone lately, and you—”

Tsukishima bites her lip, looking away from Tadashi. “I love you,” she whispers, barely audible over Tadashi’s heart beat in her ears.

“You… You what?”

“I… I love you, Yamaguchi.”

Tadashi’s eyes widen, and she takes a step back. Because,  _ no _ , Tsukki couldn’t love her. Not  _ her _ , with her weird hair and her freckles and her thighs that she was so self-concious of that she could barely convince herself to Spandex to volleyball,  _ and _ —

Tsukki’s fingers are lifting up her chin, her golden eyes boring into Tadashi’s. “Don’t think those things,” she says. Tadashi lets out a sob she didn’t know that she was holding back, launching forward and wrapping her arms around Tsukishima’s waist.

“I’ve missed you so much,” she says. She feels Tsukki’s hands on her back, and lets out another sob. “I love you, too, Tsukki. I love you so much, I didn’t…”

Tsukki kisses the top of Tadashi’s head lightly.

Tadashi’s hand clutches Tsukishima’s waist and feels the blonde’s head resting on top of hers.

\---

Tsukishima breaks up with her boyfriend.

Kageyama stops glaring at her so intensely the next day at practice when she notices their hands joined as they walk in. Hinata lets out a squeak and attacks Tadashi with hugs. 

Tadashi isn’t in the depths of despair anymore, and with Tsukki by her side, she knows that she’ll never feel that again.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> can i get a hell yeah for protective kagehina


End file.
